Lucinda's birthday comes once a year,
a secret date she keeps quiet for fear
of the birthday fairy finding out
and coming to get her, of this there's no doubt.
Since she was a child, Lucinda's been frightened
and over the years the fear's only been heightened
The stories she'd heard, and the things she was told
were just too much for a child to behold
"The Birthday Fairy is an evil terror,
she'll rip your eyes out, make no error."
each year this is what her brother would say
without fail the day before Lucinda's shh-day.
"Her blood-lust unquenchable, she simply loves the taste
of juiced-up birthday children, no need to even baste!
If she smells a hint of balloon,
a streamer, a present or a choc macaroon
she'll break down your door and grab a clump of your hair
and drag you down to her underground lair"
"And at first glance, her lair seems quite tame
but then you realise you're just a pawn in her game...
She "pin's the tail" on YOU and the pins are all rusty
and she has some cake there, but it's poisoned and dusty."
"It's set up for many with chairs, games and toys
But the only ones present are deceased girls and boys
The bones they surround you, wearing small party hats
and what is that noise? the floor's teeming with rats!"
"You want to get out, but you know there's no way
and your mantra becomes "why'd I have a birthday?!"
The fairy she giggles, a high pitched ugly cackle
And then she flies at you, going for a tackle"
"Of course you're no match for her powers so dark
in comparison to her, you're nothing more than a quark!
she gets you and eats you, with lollies and cake..."
and here, in a sweat Lucinda would awake
This particular year, the dream was quite yucky
and Lucinda awoke in a puddle of mucky
"I'm not going out, i'm not going to work!
I'll stay right here and hide from that jerk!"
Rohan sighed deeply, and got out the gun
And took sentry at the door, his prime yearly fun.
To Lucinda's brother his thoughts they did stray
and to how he'd get his revenge one sweet day...
So right around this time, in about one year
Please try to remember Lucinda's big fear
And whatever you do, don't spill crumbs on her desk,
tiny cake crumbs are what the fairy likes best!
by JK
